New Old Favorite Song

I was running around the park in Holešovice this afternoon, and an old Blink 182 song popped up on my Ipod. It instantly brought a smile to my face and a new rythm to my feet. I thought about being a stupid teenager, singing my heart out to these lyrics while jumping up and down ("dancing") and shaking my hips. I thought about all the silly mistakes I made, and all the little things that made me happy. I thought about how I enjoyed every moment of free choice I received.

Then I realized high school was 3 years ago. I'm getting older, not younger. This is the only time in my entire life that I will be 21 years old. The day I turned 21, I was sipping beers with strangers, and every single one of them told me about how they loved that age I was blossoming into. They told me, "Oh I'd give anything to be turning 21 again."

So why am I spending my time trying to act like I'm 30 by writing the best resume, getting all the bullshit internships, and scrambling to prepare myself for a secure, long-term job?

There are only 365 days of 21. That's it. Never again. I've wasted 97 of them. Well, maybe not wasted, but certainly taken for granted.

I want to be young. I want to be reckless. I want to stay up too late dancing. I want to meet weirdos. I want to get in trouble. I want to write for myself, and not for some editor's style. Not yet. Not at 21.

I see all of these young, budding journalists in my classes who've already done 3 internships. They've mindlessly lined up all sorts of 50 word clips. What are they working towards? Were those internships really beneficial to their minds or just their resumes? I'm almost disgusted by these types. Where is there character? What makes them stand out? Who are they outside that fucking piece of paper?

Blink 182 broke up in 2004. However, as of this year, they've decided to give music another chance. It's like they woke up in their beds, heard the same song I did flutter in their minds, and realize that no one escapes the fade into gray. They only have so long to feel alive and young, to play the music that makes them happy.

I think all of this reflection comes from running again. I've never felt so right as when I'm alone on an empty stretch of road with nothing but my thoughts and my music to guide me. (Oh how cliche!)

Ahoj!